Dr. Aly Savala of Sonder Psychotherapy and Wellness
Do you feel stuck in a rut with how you and your partner interact or communicate with one
another? Has the relationship begun to feel too routine, stale, or it might even feel like you are living with a roommate? Every couple needs time to reconnect with each other as it is crucial for satisfaction within a marriage.
It can be easy to miss or ignore the little things that a relationship requires for upkeep. The point is that your relationship requires maintenance, just like anything else you care about. Think about a plant you just bought for your garden or home. It needs the right amount of water, exposure to sunlight, pruning, good soil, attention to ensure no pests get to it, and tender loving care. In an ideal world, a healthy romantic relationship would benefit from care on a daily basis but most of us are too absorbed in our day to day lives that we fail to remember to intentionally connect with and attend to our partner. Reconnecting with your partner is mandatory to keep your relationship strong and secure.
Sometimes, miscommunications and misunderstandings between partners can go on for too long and you find yourself on opposing teams instead of working together for the good of the relationship. If you find yourself not practicing ways to reconnect and attune to your partner or feel you and your partner are experiencing difficulties that feel too overwhelming or challenging to overcome on your own, Dr. Aly at Sonder Psychotherapy and Wellness provides individual and couples counseling in person and virtually in Houston TX as well as 42 states across the U.S. There is no time like today to begin diving deeper into your relationship and rebuild that connection that once flowed so naturally between you and your loved one. Don’t hesitate to reach out.
1. Express Your Feelings Repeatedly
Frequently let your partner know how much they are loved, valued, and appreciated by you. It’s so easy to take our partner for granted for all the things they do for us, for the relationship, and who they are as a person. Be encouraging, upbeat, and supportive and if possible check in with them about how they are doing and how there day is going.
2. Communicate Openly and Honestly
Communication is a powerful tool and it is the key to relationships that thrive. Set aside time to talk about your relationship on a weekly or monthly basis. Check in and see if there is anything that needs to be addressed or hasn’t felt resolved. Ask your partner how they have felt loved by you and vice versa. This allows for you and your partner to learn specific ways that make you feel loved. What’s coming up for your partner this week? Any days that might be busier this week that you might be able to step in and do more that day or you can be mindful that they might be more tired than other times?
3. Spend Quality Time Together
Spend some time together and do things you both enjoy. It could be as easy as going for a walk or cooking a meal together. The important thing is to find ways to spend time together and have fun.
4. Make Time for Silliness and Fun
Laughter produces chemicals in our bodies that also are present when we are falling in love or building intimacy. Go to a comedy show or watch one at home, play an amusing board game, tap into that younger version of you and play hide in seek in the house or build a fort.
5. Show Appreciation and Gratitude Towards Your Partner
Write your partner a small thank you note for the things they do that may have felt previously unnoticed. It’s easy to find ourselves noticing our partners flaws or mistakes which is a recipe for disaster. Expressing gratitude is a healthy and natural way to notice all the things we already have and a way to make our partner feel seen and appreciated.
6. Be Affectionate
Physical touch is an important part of any relationship. Show affection by holding hands,
cuddling, or giving each other hugs. Even small gestures like a peck on the cheek or a quick
back rub can help strengthen your bond or make your partner feel loved.
7. Practice Empathy
Try to see things from your partner’s perspective and understand their feelings. It can help you to be more compassionate and supportive towards them. When you’re able to empathize with your partner, you’re better able to connect with them on an emotional level.
8. Work on Resolving Conflicts
No relationship is perfect, and conflicts are bound to happen. However, it’s important to work on resolving conflicts in a healthy way. Focus on listening without judgement, speaking without accusing or blaming, and remember that you and your partner are a team and need to work together to find the solution for the issue you are facing in the relationship.
9. Try New Things Together
Attempting to learn or try something new can help produce teamwork in your relationship as well as reignite the spark in your relationship through feelings of excitement or enjoyment. Building a new hobby together can be perfect during times of conflict, stress, boredom, or bickering. There’s an abundance of options, whether it’s trying a new restaurant, taking a cooking class on rolling sushi, learning to dance, going to a new workout class, or learning to play a sport. Trying new things together can create shared experiences and memories that can bring your closer together.
10. Keep The Romance Alive
Don’t forget to keep the romance alive in your relationship. Make time for date nights, write love notes, and surprise each other with small gestures of affection. These little things can help things from becoming too routine and strengthen your connection and help you reconnect with your partner.
11. Don’t be Afraid to Seek Professional Help
If you’re struggling to reconnect with your partner or feel that the issues you are facing as a
couple are too much to work through on your own, consider seeking professional help. A
therapist can provide guidance and support as you work through any issues in your
relationship and also help cultivate that chemistry and connection you once had.
Don’t forget, you and your romantic relationship are living things and are always changing and growing. We must make efforts to nurture and foster the connection we have with our partner.
Ready to reconnect with your partner? Contact Sonder Psychotherapy and Wellness to schedule a session with Dr. Aly Savala for individual or couples therapy.
Reconnecting with your partner can be a process that takes time, effort, and patience, but it’s worth it to strengthen your bond and improve the quality of your relationship. Whether you try a new activity together, prioritizing open communication, or seeking professional counseling, there are many ways you can reconnect with your partner. If you’re in the Houston, TX area or seeking virtual therapy in many states across the U.S. and looking for support in your relationship. Dr. Aly at Sonder Psychotherapy and Wellness offers individual counseling and couples counseling services to help you navigate the many challenges relationships face and build an even stronger connection. Don’t hesitate to reach out for help and take the first step towards a happier and healthier partnership.
